When someone who you have known and loved your whole life is gone, the world you once knew is no more. Everything seems to have changed, perspectives have shifted and things don’t feel the same. Last weekend, my Baba (Grandfather) passed away and at the moment everyone is very upset and emotional. I know people grieve differently, but the one thing pulling me through is knowing that we were truly lucky to have the time we had with a great man.
In memory of Darshan Singh Gill who sadly passed away last weekend
Lessons and Teachings
Baba and Dhaddy (my Dad’s parents) immigrated from India in the turbulent 1960s, built a life for themselves in Britain and lived to see their grandchildren and great grandchildren flourish. I know that without their influence, my Dad wouldn’t be the man he is today and I know that I wouldn’t be sitting here in this mindset right now, writing for my blog. I was taught the value of working hard from my Dad, which is passed on from Baba and that will be passed on further.
My Lasting Memory
The last time I saw Baba was last month when I came back from London for the weekend. We laughed and joked and I was telling him about my life in London. Honestly, I remember feeling that he was truly happy about the stories I was telling him and there was an air of contentment. I couldn’t ask for a better last memory with him.
Darshan Lives On
Earlier today, I rang my meditation bell just to think of him with a peaceful mind. I felt sadness but the feeling of thanks overpowered the feeling sadness and my tears became tears of gratefulness. I watched the sun set leaving chalky red smudges in the sky and the sun hid behind large clouds, illuminating other clouds to create silver lines.
As I watched the sun set, I thought of Baba – Darshan. Other than being his name, Darshan comes from the Sanskrit, darsana, meaning “sight,” “vision” or “appearance”. It is known to be a form of ceremonial worship and unlike chanting mantras or praying, performing Darshan is simply seeing the image of God/a saint/a holy image to bring spiritual fulfilment. I read about this when reading up on meditation as Darshan can happen in a vision during mediation too.
For me, the sun setting was Darshan. Although I wasn’t specifically envisioning a physical saint or holy person, I saw the work of God and I appreciated every single person who had led me to this specific moment and place. In that specific moment, I saw Darshan, my Baba.
I know our family can pull through this tough time. I have faith in everyone. I also know that we have to stick together and make effort with one and other because that’s what made Baba and Dhaddy happy. Their lessons and teachings will live on through us and will be passed onto our children – so, we need to remember to stick together and practice their teachings.
Make sure to tell the people you love how you feel whenever you can and learn and appreciate each other.